21 April 2008

We Are The Physics – You Can Do Athletics, BTW
Single of the week by a million fuckin’ miles. And not, for once, because it’s the least offensive thing here. Naysayers will harp on about WATP sounding like The Automatic but this is more urgent, exciting and irresistible than that lot have ever been and a sure sign that the ‘Physicists will go far. A monster.

Kraak And Smaak - Squeeze Me
Not exactly in New-Noise's remit this but 'Squeeze Me' is a downright ace little ditty that proves words like 'soul' and 'funk' don't always have to be considered dirty. It could even have us dancing away from our keyboard and that never happens.  

Flykkiller – Shine Out Shine Out
This has got a decent chorus. Which makes it all the more disappointing to report that everything else around it- the cartoon vocals, the trivial lyrics, the euro sleaze and the whole faux-dirty dance thump of it- is rubbish.

Twisted Wheel – She’s A Weapon
A tuneless amalgam of indie and ska with massive delusions of grandeur. This wants to be The Clash or The Kinks but sounds more like a cross between The Twang and Madness. Urgh.

Adele - Cold Shoulder
Dull, weedy, tedious, and terminally lacking in heart and soul. The new Amy Winehouse indeed.

Idle Lovers – Big Impression
This lot DEFINITELY wear white jeans.

Royworld – Dust
Daytime radio says Royworld are going to be the next big thing. New-Noise was always taught that if you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.

Dorp – Rollercoaster
This is what Christian music would sound like if Jesus jammed on U2 and Nine Inch Nails. Now that would probably make the bible more interesting but this is still smug, pompous pap.

Jont – Candlelit
This would be kind of nice, kind of fluffy, if your friend were making it up on the spot in front of a sunset somewhere. But from a man with a record label and everything, it’s surely ok to expect more.

Leila – Mettle
Quite why anyone thought this would work as a single is a mystery (although it is out on Warp), but that doesn’t mean it’s no good. ‘Mettle’ is almost five minutes of one-woman dark, ominous noise that, if it gets anywhere close, will make the Top 40 shit its innards out in fear. And that’s a good thing. An extra mark too for sharing a name, if not a spelling, with New-Noise’s almighty leader.

Alexander Tucker – Custom Made
A lovely idea this. After a little shove from ATP Records, Kent noisenik Alexander Tucker has taken up the challenge of choosing four songs- something old, something new, something borrowed (here, a Fursaxa cover) and something blue (the sadface chant of ‘Florance Blue’) and finished up with fairly engaging results. Now if only the label could convince someone really interesting to get involved.