The Conformists - Three Hundred

by Nadeem Ali

Too clever for its own good post-rock noise

"‘Three Hundred’ is an angular, abstract mess that will put off three times as many people that will love it."

The Conformists have been twisting guitar music into new shapes for over ten years. Like Oxes and Shellac they take something pretty inaccessible and make it somewhat less inaccessible.

‘Three Hundred’ is an angular, abstract mess that will put off three times as many people that will love it. It is an album that will frustrate as many people as it pleases. In fact it would be a frustrating album even for those it pleases. The Conformists no doubt themselves take great pleasure in this. They are thoroughly non-conformist in their approach to laying out their post-rock grooves.

Despite the band’s bizarre attempts to sabotage their own record ‘Three Hundred’ is just about successful. They just about avoid novelty rocking. There are moments of playful self-indulgence and moments of pointless self-indulgence. How much is pretension and ho much is pissing around is hard to discern at times. This is something else that probably brings a smile to the faces of these weirdoes.

Guitar, bass, drums and the odd vocals are all used as weapons to confuse the listener. They take you down dark, dank paths and up febrile, enchanting trails. The abrasive, staccato ’Are These Flowers’ dares to teach Shellac a lesson in musical misanthropy. It is both harsh and yet strangely alluring. The epic ‘You’re Welcome’ wanders about intensely looking for trouble. Guitars bristle with an almost tangible tension. ‘Tax Deduction’ is a prickly affair reminiscent of Slint at their most eerily wiry and passive-aggressive.

‘Black People’ has a great title but starts off with an endless series of climaxes before launching into a muscular piece of rocking post-hardcore. The smart arse likes of ‘Stairway To Heaven’ and ‘Laundry Hepburn’ are fun for a few listens but are too slight and end up as essentially inane filler.

Not many people will love them but The Conformists are an endearing band if you happen to like your music difficult and filled with sarcasm.

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